I don't know. Maybe I'm just imagining it. I don't feel wanted. I can't find a reason for me to be thinking such things, but the thought is lingering in my head. Maybe I'm not wanted. Maybe it's just me being stupid. I have a short supply of friends but they like me. Right? I hope so. I know it seems like I am asking the whole world questions that can't be answered. Only me and my "friends" can answer these questions. Unless of you're a shrink or something like that. But that's beside the point. I am not here to impress you with my words. Hmm...it seems like I'm complaining doesn't it. I guess I am but it's hard not to do so. I just feel unwanted by my friends and everybody else in the world. I don' t know. I'll get back to you on this topic...

So...greetings...I'm Felicia. Ryan. Bartley.
Ok. So now you know my full name. Well the majority of it.
Right now I'm not doing so good but I'll get through it.
I don't like to make people feel bad about themselves or anything...at all. I absolutely hate it. And when I do do that I feel like the most horrible person on the face of the earth.
I'm sorry if I've ever done that to you. I plead for your forgiveness.
I guess I'm giving you my background in this rather than on my "Profile" or "Myspace." I just find it easier to tell you in this little handy-dandy post. But yeah.

...Back to the orignial topic...
Lately I've been blaming myself for everything going wrong in my life or somebody else's life that I care about. I guess I feel as if I don't deserve any friends at all. And I don't. I have a tendency to hurt everyone I care about. I try not to...but I'm that stupid. I just have to. I don't like seeing people miserable but I make them that way anway. It's retarded. All the guys I know hate me (more than likely), I don't blame them. But some of them are just plain out stupid. I don't mean to be mean about it but it's true. I try to be nice to everyone. And they get the wrong idea. They either think I'm a whore, I like/love them, or I must be cheating on them. Basically, they more than likely think I'm a whore. Sorry that I like being with guys rather than girls. Guys can fight over some stupid shit but girls are worse. Guys don't start "drama" with every little thing there is. On the long run. Girls just suck. That's all there is to it. They blow. (Literally and metaphorically.) There's a small percent of girls that aren't like the rest. The ones that don't bring a whole bunch od "drama" into one's life. I know that I'm not one of them. All the people in the world come to just one person to drop all the drama on. That is me. In a way. I'm always stuck with every else's problems. Don't get me wrong. I like helping people. Just don't overload me with it. It'll drive me mad! I'm not the one to give advice. I just mainly listen to what's going on. And if I think it's real bad I'll say something. But if I think you can handle it on your own then I just stay quiet. You should be able to solve things on your own. Here I am. Complaining..."yes" but I figure things out on my own. I don't take advice on problems that often. I know the person means well but I just want to try it my way, and if it doesn't work I try it your way. But my way works for me 98% of the time. All my friends say they don't like giving advice because the always give the "wrong" advice. Well you're not giving the wrong advice. It's something that you would do. Your not deliveratly telling the person what to do. You're giving them advice, and it's their choice if they want to apply it to themselves. It's not your fault if it didn't go well for the person. It's theirs. They decided to talke it for themselves. Anyway, if you used that then you would have made it works because you knew exactly what you were talking about. I guess what I'm trying to day is don't feel bad for something that isn't your fault.

I got off topic. But it's ok. When I fugure out my own things I'll post it.
Thanks for reading.

-Peace and love.